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____________________________________________________________________ [ 1:. [ Chain Letters ] [obsolete] :. ] [obsolete@b0g.org] :. ] ____________________________________________________________________ Hi my name is obsolete and I'm suffering from extreme guilt from not forwarding 50 million fucking chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on then a poor little Ethiopian girl with a vagina on her forehead will receive enough money to have it removed before her parents sell her to the plantation owners. I mean can you believe the stupidity behind this shit, like AOL is gonna give you a hundred dollars if you send an email to everyone on your list. BULLSHIT! Oh wait I better scroll down and make a wish so I can get laid by every model on the face of the earth. So basically all I'm saying is FUCK YOU to all the losers that have nothing better to do than forward gay ass emails about stupid faggots in Botswana with no arms and no legs that need you to forward this so they can get a miracle transplant. Wait if I don't send it maybe the little chain-mail fairies will come in and sodomize me in my sleep, or kill me by anal electrocution, for not sending on an email that was started in 21 BC by Jesus, YES JESUS!! And if I send it, and it continues it will be in the Guinness Book of World Records for the lamest thing ever done on a computer or with e- mail for that matter. Do people actually look at these things or what........I mean FUCK! Look at what your sending out and have some type of fucking intelligence people. Chances are your just stupid to realize what the hell you are sending out! Now lets go through the 4 basic types of chain letters: Chain Letter #1: Hello and thanks for reading this letter. The reason I am sending this is because you see there's this little boy in Zimbabwe who has no arms and no legs, and his parents left him at birth. The sad part about it is that his parents left him in a herd of goats and he gets ass raped 10-12 times a day. But you can help this boy fight off these madly horny goats by forwarding this chain letter to 94,456 people in the next 32 seconds, he will get 1 cent donated by the Zimbabwean Armless Legless Ass Raped Fund for every person that receives this letter. So send it fast. Chain Letter #2: (scroll down) make a wish! go ahead! not that you hornball! finger getting tired yet? ok STOP!!@#!@#$ Man wasn't that fun, I hope you made a great wish because now you must send this to 1,350 people in the next 56 seconds to make it come true. But if you don't you will be hunted down by mad sheep and get assfucked like a young schoolboy, and rabid donkeys will make you eat their asshole out while they play checkers. So send it now. Its true! Not like all of those other fake ones!#@#$ This one is TRUE!@#~!$ Here's how it is: *1-2 people = At least 2 of your friends will be pissed off at you for sending them shit. *3-5 people = At least 5 of your friends will be pissed off at you for sending them shit and will e-mail you a response. *5-10 people = At least 10 of your friends will be pissed off at you for sending them shit and may form a plot against your life. *10-20 people = Everyone will be pissed off at you and they will throw draino bombs at your house, and may form a plot on your life. Chain Letter #3: Hey there everyone! You are extremely lucky because this chain letter that you have just received has been in existence since 1886. (This is absofuckinglutely infuckingcredible because e-mail wasn't even around then and I'm sure there wasn't this many loser ass bitches around to send this shit out.) If you continue this chain letter, and it continues to the year 2000 then it will make into The Guiness Book of World Records. Here's what you have to do: Forward this to 10,906 people in the next 4 minutes or this could happen to you: *Bizarre Horror Story #1* K-Rad-Bob was walking home from school one day by the ocean. He had received this letter but ignored it. Next thing he knew he was tackled from behind and thrown aboard a ship full of Russian sailors. He was ass raped by them all and later died by bleeding to death because his sphincter muscle was torn into 600 pieces. THIS COULD HAPPEN TO YOU!@#$!@ *Bizarre Horror Story #2* One day Prae was driving in his car with his boyfriend (some people swing that way). He had received this letter earlier that day and deleted it like any other chain letter. While in his car, he and his boyfriend were struck by a farm truck carrying rabid goats. Normally Prae would have been happy except these goats had been genetically altered and they had twelve inch cocks. Prae tried to run but the goats got to him first and ripped his virgin asshole open like knife through hot butter. He then died after one of the goats poked his dick in Prae's mouth, and in self defense, Prae bit down and bit the goats dick right off. But when one of the goats slammed its dick into Prae's ass he accidentally swallowed it and choked to death. THIS IS A TRUE STORY!@#$ So you better send this on or you could end up like Bob and Prae. Chain Letter #4: A friend is someone who always loves you, Even if you smell like catfood and your breath reeks of shit. A friend is someone who pretends to like you even if they think you should be shot in the face and eaten by cannibals. A friend is someone who likes you even if your ugly as a dogs asshole, A friend is someone who stays the night with you so you can cry about your sad, sad life. A friend is someone who would never forward a chain letter to a worthless piece of dog shit like you. A friend is someone who scrubs the toilet, vacuums, doesn't speak much English, and gets the check and leaves.....no wait that's the cleaning lady. Now pass this on or you will never ever have sex again......the point being??? Half of you people that forward these chain letters get no sex anyway...so what does it really matter??? What I'm trying to say is don't pass on stupid shit like this......if its funny send it on... make someone's day....but don't threaten them that they will have bad luck or that they will let the 91 year old man in Calicut with no teeth that's tied to a dead zebra will die if they don't send it on so he can get his 5 cents per email. Just realize what your doing when you send someone some stupid crap about nothing... -obsolete b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@! b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@! b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@! b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@! b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!b0g!#@!