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____________________________________________________________________ [11:. - [ Re Re: How To Mack Da Bitchez ] [xhaze] :. ] [xhaze@b0g.org] :. ] ____________________________________________________________________ "xhaze man, im not getting any chicks, the last chick that touched me was this 13yr old girl at school who beat me up and stole my lunch money :`(, i need help on macking them f00s," gl0bal explained. "I really need help!" As eye listened to gl0bal i felt pity 4 him and replied "HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!$!@" After about three days of laughing and tormenting gl0bal eye contacted him again with good news, "Sure man i'll help you get some hoes, infact heaps of b0ggers are a lot like j00, pathetic, sad, and seks0rless," i told him to make him feel better, "I will write a multiple step program on how to get them hoes, and fuck them tew!" gl0bal gleefully said "Oh thank you uber, elite one, im not worthy of your seksyness and/or ways of life, how can i ever repay you?!" "Just get out of my sight." I replied while flicking my wrist in the direction of the door and i continued getting hand fed by 4 exotic seksi bitchez. Seeing I am a max gangseks/leperseks/honkhonkseks h4x0r, I am going to shed light on all of you sadassmofo's. Here is my multiple step program on picking up chicks. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+ |T|H|E| |P|R|O|G|R|A|M| |I|T|S|E|L|F| +-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Welcome to my 31337[-31329] Program for 'Macking Them Bitchez' STEP ONE: The Unthinkable First we need to delete all of our pr0n collection. This is so your futile balls, can for once, carry their intended amount of semen. Seeing most of you milk yourself dry every few hours :((( >XD :D :o :) :( | .'`~. | .~~. | . . | | |¯ `. |¯ `. |¯ . |¯ `. |¯ 9:00am 10:30am 1:05pm 3:30pm 8:28pm Wake up After Breakfast After Lunch During S-Club7 Before The 830 TV Program Movie Hint0.1: If you cannot bring yourself to deleting your pr0n, put it on CD-R/W and hide them &/OR give them to a mate to hold onto while your on my 31337[-31329] step program. STEP TWO: The Self-Secure Find a mirror somewhere and look into it. Now tell yourself daily, "Eye am a pjearless xhaze follower and eye can mack the hotteyze..strait serve!!!" Take off your clothes and look at your body... See how your right arm is much muscular than your left arm, this is one of the reasons why we have STEP ONE. Also note that your pathetic flaccid penith curves right.. also why we have STEP ONE. .d88 88b. 8888 d88P" 88b. 8888' d88P _ "Y88b ______ 8888 888 _| |_ Y88b |______| 8888 888 |_ _| 888 ______ 8888 Y88b |_| 888 |______| 8888 Y88bb. .dd88Y .£8888D. Y88888b .d8888Y £8888D `'UY8 'Y8YU'` 'e88b BOOMER-WANG + COUNTER-WANK = SUPER PENITH Hint0.2: If you want to (bare in mind that you will be 6 months behind) you can get your pr0n back however you 'disposed' of it, and if you really did dispose of it, you lame fuck, download more. I can never emphasize this enough...WANK WITH j00R LEFT ARM EACH AND EVERYTYME for 6 MONTHS (± 4 months depending on your wanking schedule.) This will even up your arm sizes, and hopefully counter-wank your penith back to straightness. STEP THREE: THE HOE-DIGERTY-HO-DOWN Goto a social gathering...that has the opposite seks there!!! I know what you were thinking....and no, not this weeks LAN, but a place where you consume alcohol &/OR drugs, like the only LAN i've been to...but NOT A LAN! hey SKULL SKULL NALA BABE seksi j00 by yourself .V after one drink :D (: [: :) (: :o/ `'''`'''o: |-o /I ¯| ¯`¯/| | ¯| __:o.. L 4 | / | | _| | ``'... DANCE!! SKULL Hint0.3: Helpful place suggestions:- 1) The Pub - Where all the maynegy butch bitches hang and drink more beer that j00. 2) A School - For people like odin, but for gods sake don't make a 'mistake' like him as you cannot complete this program inside jail. 3) Town - Exactly that...town, you get all kinds here. Hint0.70WN: Best place is sitting outside a surf/skate/snow shop, as all the foxee gurleez are the s/s/s chixxx 4) Nightclub - Where all the hot beetcheez dance in sk1mpee clothes. Hint0.C1U8: For advanced users only, as if you are a newbie/#!/pr0gram kiddie, you will not be able to keep you vital full load..full.. 5) Party - This is where a large group of friends get together to socialize to load music. Well heard-about parties work like a triangle scam. bigger chance for you to pick upp0r a chick0r. STEP FOUR: CONTACT Engage verbal contact with the ch1x0r. DO'S: Tell her how hawt and seksy she is. Compliment her. Mention the name 'xhaze' somewhere as she'll be sure to know me. [Only use if talking to ++HAWT++ATH00>CHICK] complement her b0g dot org DONT'S: Tell her she looks like a porn star that you’ve wanked over. Talk about your oc129 rootshell's, or anything computer related. Just stare at her tits. Don't fondle yourself. For satan's sake don't fondle yourself. STEP FI5E R.I.P: TAKE ME AWAY!@ If she shows interest, invite her back to j00r uber bachelor pad. You can tell she's interested if... 1) She plays with her hair. 2) Asks you for a farq. (Usually only asked once you hab mentioned 'xhaze') 3) Actually talks to you for longer than 5 minutes. 4) She starts fondling herself. Once baque to j00r max-pad, take her into j00r FLATMATES rooms...not yours$!@ as the empty coke bottles and chip packets that are covering the floor, won't turn her on that much. Instead j0UR flatmat, who should be MUCH k00-er than you, will hab a solid room. Which will suit her needs more than your room. ___________________________ | | | * = Wank Rags |D | <<=your 3="" 4="" 6="" 14="" 50="" computer="" desk="" from="" months="" .="" o="" stereo="" speakers="" :.="" spare="" parts="" ur="" single="" bed="" your="" pathetic="" rom="" __________________________________="" huge="" love="" seetee="" fur="" mat="" fire="" in="" place="" king="" front="" of="" size="" flatmates="" shack="" hint0.55:="" put="" some="" maqqing="" muzik.="" hint0.551:="" do="" not="" uber="" k00="" mates="" victory="" records="" kottonmouth="" kings="" or="" fear="" factory.="" hint0.5mac:="" play="" that="" barry="" white="" s="" sitting="" the="" even="" s.o.a.d="" seeing="" its="" almost="" fucking="" mainstream="" step="" six-6-six:="" seqsing="" part="" just="" replicate="" copious="" amounts="" _xxx_hardcore-divx.avi="" porn="" ve="" watched="" and="" home="" free.="" if="" this="" max="" 8ay8e="" is="" a="" freak="" then="" where="" comes="" into="" play.="" before="" withdrawing="" deposit="" pull="" out="" penith="" her="" anal="" bl0w="" it="" all="" over="" fayceorbrearstsorst0mache.="" mega-saved-up-load="" will="" drown="" also="" impress="" se7en:="" mourning="" after="" she="" was="" bad="" r00t="" here="" are="" few="" pointers="" av0id4nce...="" options="" sneeq="" back="" to="" j00r="" room.="" ll="" think="" itwas="" flatmate="" did="" blashsphemous="" no-matter="" what="" he="" tells="" rotten="" lying="" h0h0.="" hint0.r00m:="" werx="" best="" drunk="" night="" which="" most="" likely="" _you_="" g0t="" tew="" er.="" pretend="" dead.="" tell="" ghey="" re-enforce="" statement="" by="" putting="" broom="" up="" ass="" beat="" till="" unconscious="" take="" womans="" refuge="" with="" note="" stuk="" saying="" my="" boyfriend="" beats="" me="" daily="" because="" eye="" gib="" you="" cannot="" av0id="" reveal="" _real_you_="" show="" ridden="" room="" how="" much="" _loser_you_are_.="" for="" extremely="" rare="" cases="" find="" etc="" p4qu37="" ass...again="" eyte:="" triple="" r="" last="" simple....="" repeat="" root="" run="" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------="" question:="" so="" i="" bitch="" cum..="" complains="" about="" taste="" should="" answer:="" easy.="" drink="" lots="" cum="" tastes="" like="" smoke="" heaps="" weed.="" assume="" eat="" enough="" anything="" have="" slight="" object="" ...ask="" likes.......hopefully="" bisexual="" replies="" had="" penis="" removed="" an="" africian="" tribe="" voodoo="" doctor..="" case="" doomed="" may="" recommend="" step-3="" 2...="" jail="" good="" ppl="" who="" receive...="" when="" approach="" group="" these="" at="" party..="" can="" they="" well="" look="" really="" young="" be="" feet="" tall.="" more="" information="" contact="" subject="XkiddiE" would="" sex="" different="" chicks="" now="" got="" apt..="" but="" t="" fit="" bedroom="" backyard.="" plus="" dont="" hab="" clean="" times="" am="" thinking="" paying="" poor="" mexician="" aid="" satisfying="" getting="" using="" methods..="" fair="" price="" pay="" question="" reply....fuck="" him.....ring="" b0iler="" we="" free="" speak="" yourself..="" charge="" hour="" 14ph="" h0h0="" section="" asked="" real="" big="" mackers="" b0g="" absolutley="" eleet="" totally="" random="" phreaks="" channels.="" __________________="" leet0h="" pplz="" ----------------------------="" kill="" their="" tend="" especially="" end="" eating="" them.="" data-cke-pa-on="" data-cke-pa-one="" data-cke-pa-once="" data-cke-pa-only="" data-cke-pa-once..="">8D~Go up to the hott chick and ask for her hand. Draw a line across it and explain that its a really big river, and there is a bunny on one side of the river that reall needs to get to the other side. Now ask her how he can cross the river. Give cute little answers as to why the bunny can't cross the river (ie...bunny jump in river, bunny go *glubglubglub*.) When the chick finaly asks how the bunny gets to the otherside, give her cute puppy dog eyes and say "I don't know, I just wanted to hold your hand." bring the girls to me. bored: what advice would you give to young men trying to have sex with girls? my dog is having an epileptic attack ok.. thanks for your help someone give me advice for how to seduce a girl into having sex with me. lol@xhaze someone give me advice for how to seduce a girl into having sex with me. xhaze: take her out to a restaurant, afta go back to urs, sip on sum wine, stroke her cheek with ur hand, then kiss her and it leads on no.. I mean like what drugs should I give her? r0x0r their b0x0rz what does that mean? I don't know.. I am jewish. I AM DICK KWAN!#$ DICK KWAN!!!!! ________________________________________________ -----------------|TOTALLY RANDOM MOFOS ADVICE FROM RANDOM CHANNELS|------------- ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ *** Now talking in #dogsex got any advice for macking dogs? sure, get naked, bend over, and they will mack you, eks dogs, especially male dogs... are like most males, they wont turn down sex eks-club7, feel free to ask questions & chat about sex with canines [At this point eye left as i knew i'd be aroused.] *** Now talking in #gaynetmeeting got any advice on macking hoes? on cam u mean? fuck off y0. just do not be shy and just start talking to a guy eerrrrrr *** Now talking in #toiletsex im wondering if i can get advice on macing a hoe into recieving a golden shower for pee play it's often a good idea to start in the shower. when you're sharing a shower, just suggest that you don't need to leave the shower to pee if she's happy with the very mild play, just peeing in each other's presence, then you can work up to the more interesting games like what sort of games can i play? submerge? golden submarine? I mean games in a very general sense, a golden shower is a pee game that you're interested in *** Now talking in #snuffsex eye would liek to introduce my bitch into snuff sex, i need some advice on the perfect snuff. well i'd wish you to snuff me after kinky rough sex would you let me slice you up? yes let me thrust my cock in your nose? yes would you try and snuff me if you were her? im a slave what type of death would you like? describe your perfect snuff hanged naked in woods while i lick out your cunt thats dripping in blood from your 12cm deep stab wound on your stomach? yes please, maybe we can meet, i live in europe. sorry whore, im in nz :( *** Now talking in #teens what should I do to get a girl interested in playing with my penis? lol Turn gay how will that help? It wont, but you seem to have some problems getting them to beinterested, so just gogay, its better for you that way I doubt having a cock up my anus will help get girls to play with my penis *** You have been kicked off #teens by Couch (Banned for Swearing!!!) *** Now talking in #e-commerce anyone run a sex shop site that sell pumps with overnight delivery? I want over 5 inches by friday stick it in a trouser press that will work? no, but it will teach you a lesson. *** Now talking in #christians sex *** mode/#christians [+b *!s?k?-?e?@210-54-198-42.d??l?p.?tra.?o.?z] by NAZO *** You have been kicked off #christians by NAZO (bad word detected) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ |S|O|L|I|D| |C|O|N|C|L|U|S|I|O|N| +-+-+-+-+-+ +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- b0g > girl + good seks0r > * .: j(00) - W4NK = 100%